LOVE IS BEST DESCRIBED THAN DEFINED

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Love defined (?) 
Love is probably the most debated, discussed and analyzed word in the world, but still remains the least understood word in the world. It is everywhere – in our songs, in our books, on our television screens, on the radios and in the movies. It is always on our tongues, in our thoughts and always a part of our conversations.
Yet, for all these debates and discussions and analysis, many of us don't know and understand the true nature love.
Everyone tries to define love in his or her own way, but the definitions are always incomplete. 
For over eight years now that I have deliberately and diligently studied about love, I have been asked countless times to define love. Well, I have always defined love as “your thoughts, feelings, sayings and actions that are in the best interest of others”; but always after this definition, I still see it as incomplete.
As hard as one will try to define love, something is always missing in the definition. 
In first Corinthians 13:1-3, apostle Paul listed a number of good things a person can do or possess in life: speak in tongues of men and of angels; have the gift of prophecy, understand all mysteries, have all knowledge and great faith; give all goods to feed the poor, and give body (life) to be burned.
Yet he concluded, “But if I have no love, I am nothing.”
So, what is love?
Some will say, “Love is about showing concern”; but how do you explain the many hungry people whom Jesus did not feed? Does it mean he didn’t love them?
Another will say, “Love is about giving”; but how do you explain Jesus’ rebuke of Judas for suggesting that the precious ointment Mary had poured upon Jesus could have been sold and the proceeds given to the poor?
Others will say, “Love is speaking kindly and pleasantly,’’ but how do you explain the harsh and rebuking words of Jesus to the Pharisees, and sometimes to His disciples?
There is more to love than we often think. It will not give to you when it knows it is not what you need. It is not blind to shut its eyes to the faults of its loved ones. It will rebuke and discipline when the need arises. To give just because it is requested and to shut its eyes to all faults to evade the unpleasantness of the discipline is to harm the loved one.

Love is best described
I always say that "Love is not self-defining, but best described."
Love is a composite subject. It is like a white light which when passed through a prism, splits into its component rainbow-like series of colours. It is like a diamond with many faces; sparkling differently whichever way it is turned. It is displayed in many different habits beautiful like the colours of the rainbow.
Describing love in 1 Corinthians 13, what is known as "The Love Chapter" of the bible, the apostle Paul said, “Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love vaunts not itself, and is not puffed up; does not behave itself unseemly/rudely, does not seek its own; keeps no records of wrongs; is not easily provoked; rejoices not in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears, believes, hopes, and endures all things” — these habits make up the supreme gift – Love!!!

Love Demonstrated 
Anyone who professes to live a life of Love would have to learn to display the radiant habits of love. Love is many-faceted and one cannot call himself a person of love until he has learnt to live all the habits of love (which we will look at in the next series of articles). The demonstration of love is unconditional. It is a choice based on a deliberate decision.

A group of college students toured the slums of a city, and one of the girls, seeing a little girl playing in the dirt, asked a guide, "Why doesn't her mother clean her up?"
"Madam," the guide replied, "that girl's mother probably loves her, but she doesn't hate dirt. You hate dirt, but you don't love the girl enough to go down there and clean her up. Until hate for dirt and love for that child are in the same person, that little girl is likely to remain as she is." Such is the nature of the brilliance of God-like love, Agape love. It is a many-splendored thing.

References 

  1. Reduce Me to Love by Joyce Meyer 
  2. The Law of Love and Love as a Law by Mark Hopkins
Sammy Adjei is a Love & Relationship Expert with a compelling passion to help individuals, couples and families build lovely relationships. Sammy is licensed by the Ghana Psychology Council as a Counselor [Lay Practitioner]. He is a member of the Ghana Psychological Association, and the Ghana Academy of Christian Counselors. Contact: +233 (0) 207295852

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