LOVE AND LOVE Reflections

Photo credit: shutterstock.com Very often people ask: “How can I know that it is real love and also tell that the love is deep enough to lead us to marriage and sustain us together? The following tests can help you determine that the love is genuine to ensure the success of the relationship. 1. The Sharing Test: True love always wants to share and give. It thinks and looks out for opportunities to give to the other. How often do you like to share with your partner a good book you read, a good counsel you received, exciting news you heard or your money? There is one thing which is indispensable for relationships. That is sharing! Share to enrich your relationships. Ask yourself: Are we able to share together? Is our love more interested in giving than getting?   2. The Respect Test: There is no real love without respect. Does your partner have your respect? You may admire your partner for something they do; but would you feel honoured to introduce him or her t...

Photo credit: www.shutterstock.com After my previous article where I made an exposition that the reality of love is the reason why a man shall leave his parents and cleave to his wife, I kept thinking of what actually then keeps them together after the marriage. Couples exchange vows during the marriage ceremony – promises to take each other “in health and in sickness; for richer and for poorer; for better for worse . . .” – and they are expected to remember their vows always. But as the realities set in and they pass through the stages of marriage life, – children come in, work becomes more demanding, and sexual desire and physical appearances diminish – many “forget” their vows, and the result normally is divorce.  So if the vow exchanged by couples on their wedding day is not able to keep them together, then what will? It then struck me that after the couple leave, they are to cleave; and to cleave means to stick, be glued to or to keep tight. So what will ...

The major reference to the institution of marriage in the Bible is the statement “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh” (Gen.2:24 KJV). But a word in this statement that many of us have somewhat overlooked is the first word of the statement: “ therefore ”. The word “therefore”, which the statement begins with alludes to the fact that there is a reason for which a man shall leave his parents, and cleave unto his wife to be one flesh. So, what will make a man who stays comfortably with his parents, and having no “obligations and responsibilities” leave them to cleave unto his wife (with all its associated responsibilities)? What will make a woman well protected, and who probably is surrounded with “maids and servants” to do all the household chores in her parents’ home leave them to get married to a man and “burden” herself with these obligations and responsibilities? Why do males and females so ...

You would not abandon your car and buy a new one just because your fuel is exhausted, you will definitely refill the fuel tank; and you would not dispose off your mobile phone just because the battery is flat, you will recharge it. These items, though not in any way equated to marriage, but if you would fix these challenges that come with them, then why would you move out of your marriage which is more valuable when challenges arise that can be resolved? God never instituted marriage as a “shuttle” or “transit” where you “hop in and out” at your will. Jesus, answering the Pharisees question about divorce said, “What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder” (Mtt.19:6b). It is inferred from this that God is directly involved in the marriage as He joins the two together, and He makes the marriage for life.  The Pharisees after, said unto Jesus that Moses allowed divorce, but He pointed out that Moses allowed divorce because of the “hardness of their ...

Source: istockphoto.com Indeed there can be no marriage without leaving, but one major challenge that many couples face is “leaving” their relationship with their parents, families, friends and their single adult lifestyle, to cleave to their new family.  They are torn between the responsibilities of their “new home” and their “previous home”, thus creating a lot of tension. Leaving is Hard Leaving is a fundamental principle of marriage but it is very hard and actually a bitter pill to swallow by both parents and children. The thought of not “seeing” each other cause pain in the heart and sometimes tears are shed.  Normally the mothers (of the men) are the culprits to the point that some even get depressed. They keep thinking and asking themselves: “Will she be able to wash his shirts well?” “Will she even know how much salt or pepper he likes in his soup or stew?” “Can she make him happy?” (You and I can relate with The Vodafone Advert of a moth...