LOVE AND LOVE Reflections

You would not abandon your car and buy a new one just because your fuel is exhausted, you will definitely refill the fuel tank; and you would not dispose off your mobile phone just because the battery is flat, you will recharge it. These items, though not in any way equated to marriage, but if you would fix these challenges that come with them, then why would you move out of your marriage which is more valuable when challenges arise that can be resolved? God never instituted marriage as a “shuttle” or “transit” where you “hop in and out” at your will. Jesus, answering the Pharisees question about divorce said, “What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder” (Mtt.19:6b). It is inferred from this that God is directly involved in the marriage as He joins the two together, and He makes the marriage for life.  The Pharisees after, said unto Jesus that Moses allowed divorce, but He pointed out that Moses allowed divorce because of the “hardness of their ...

Source: istockphoto.com Indeed there can be no marriage without leaving, but one major challenge that many couples face is “leaving” their relationship with their parents, families, friends and their single adult lifestyle, to cleave to their new family.  They are torn between the responsibilities of their “new home” and their “previous home”, thus creating a lot of tension. Leaving is Hard Leaving is a fundamental principle of marriage but it is very hard and actually a bitter pill to swallow by both parents and children. The thought of not “seeing” each other cause pain in the heart and sometimes tears are shed.  Normally the mothers (of the men) are the culprits to the point that some even get depressed. They keep thinking and asking themselves: “Will she be able to wash his shirts well?” “Will she even know how much salt or pepper he likes in his soup or stew?” “Can she make him happy?” (You and I can relate with The Vodafone Advert of a moth...

Marriage is God-designed, God-instituted, God-made, God-ordained, God-enabled, and God-owned. He thus has the manual or plan guiding its operation. God’s guiding principle of marriage otherwise known as God’s plan for marriage is a statement repeated about four times in the Bible: “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife and they shall be one flesh” (Gen.2:24, Mtt.19:5, Mk.10:7-8 and Eph.5:31 KJV). The principle has three elements; what I call “The Three-fold Mystery of Marriage”: Leaving, Cleaving and One flesh/Unifying. Leaving There can be no marriage without leaving – your parents, friends, old habits and lifestyle, and anything that could interfere with your marriage.  The word “Leaving” means to loosen . A public and legal act is performed for you to be under “wedlock”. Marriage is never a private affair! – It concerns more than just the two individuals getting married. Physically it means you ...

In the eyes of many people these days, the institution of marriage has lost its relevance, and they question whether it is still a good idea and worth it. The value of marriage has been lost in the sight of many. Many of us do not regard the sacred nature of marriage. It is not surprising because the concepts of honour, trust, faithfulness, commitment and love which are characterized by marriage seem old-fashioned and out of touch with the contemporary world. For most of us, our partners are like panties and shoes – we change them as we wish. We shop for partners as we do for our clothes – we try it on and if it does not fit, we try something else; if it fits, we wear it for a while, and when it fades or goes out of style, we throw it away and get a new one. But God established marriage as an Honourable relationship; an institution that should be highly honoured by all (Heb.13:4), respected and valued. He made it to be esteemed above all other institutions. Marriage w...