"LOVE MY WEAKNESS"
Falling
in love means that you accept both the “good looks” and the “bad looks” of your
partner. You need to ask yourself; can I accept her flaws? Can I cope with his
irritating character? Loving your partner means looking at her faults and
honestly saying, “I can work around it”. It is about saying to yourself, “I can
make something out of his weaknesses.”
In
relationships, it is very easy to accept, admire and appreciate the strengths of
our partners, but most often their weaknesses take a toll on us and cause
couples to fall out of love.
The
flaws of people are part of their makeup, so be ready to welcome those
weaknesses with open arms. Someone said “For every evil under the sun, there is
a remedy or there is none. If there is one, seek till you find it; if there is
none, never mind it.” Join me as we walk through these tips to help us accept
and appreciate the weaknesses of our loved ones.
1. Admit you have weakness too:
The best way to love the imperfections of your partner is to be aware of and
accept your own weaknesses. Your partner might be a talkative and you are so
irritated by it. Do you know how your muteness and quietness frustrates her?
2. Accept that your partner is not
perfect: No human is perfect. Your partner is endowed with
all the “good looks” that attracted you to her, but accept that she is not
perfect; she has some “bad looks” too. Do not enter into the relationship with
the intention to change/mould your partner to suit you. You will fail –and don’t
forget the mother tried and failed!
3. Communicate to your partner in love
(Eph. 4:15): Do it carefully, just let your partner
know what bothers you. Odds are that, they may not be able to stop, but
decisions and efforts can be made. This can also create the avenue and platform
for your partner to voice out his/her concerns to give you the opportunity to
address issues you may be committing inadvertently but may be irritating your
partner.
However, don’t attack personalities, just talk about how you feel. Also, avoid sarcasm and gossip about your partner’s weakness. They are hurtful. They can create scars that may never or take time to heal.
However, don’t attack personalities, just talk about how you feel. Also, avoid sarcasm and gossip about your partner’s weakness. They are hurtful. They can create scars that may never or take time to heal.
4. See the positives and assets in
your partner: Your lover might have flaws and they
are easy to get hung up on them. But instead, try to magnify the positive
attributes of your partner; list them –compassionate, good-willed, honest,
kindhearted, humorous, good cook –perhaps all, and thank God for giving you a
person with such admirable traits. Verbalize these traits to your partner and
let them know how much blessed you are to have them in your life. Surely, they
will appreciate and be inclined to be more positive. Do well to replace condemnations
with commendations.
5. Maximize your partner’s weakness:
Work with your partner’s weakness and not against it. Don’t criticize what you
see as weakness. Study your partner; know their likes and dislikes. Think of
your own flaws and the strengths of your partner that complement your flaws. Then
think of your strengths that complement your partner’s flaws. Balance each
other to help make each other a better person. Talkatives are often very good salesmen/bargainers,
while quiet people are often very observant with an eye for “good” things. These
two can complement each other during shopping to buy quality stuff at
reasonable prices.
6. Be forgiving:
Your partner is as human as you are, and may stumble now and then. If your
spouse makes a mistake, be ready to forgive. Don’t hold grudges.
7. Commit it to God:
God’s grace is sufficient, and his strength works best in your partner’s weakness.
Ask Him to make you gracious in your partner’s weakness and depend on Him to make
your strength perfect in your partner’s weakness.
Whatever your partner’s weakness,
bear in mind you made a choice –you chose him/her; their good looks and
weaknesses. Remember like paint, love covers a multitude of weaknesses (sins)!
REFERENCES
- “I Love You But Why Are We Different?” by Tim LaHaye
- http://happymarriage.com
- http://beliefnet.com
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